The Worst of Both Worlds

office-cubicle-trapIt’s Monday morning. You walk outside your house. You are on your way to work. It’s a beautiful day. It’s another day that promises to be sunny without an imposing heat. You are filled with hope and a few positive thoughts. Your mind might be on that coffee you are sipping or it might be far far away, preoccupied with memories or future plans or random philosophical questions. The first few humans you encounter on your way to work ruin everything. That never stopping downtown attitude reminds you of where you really are – a stew made of New York City business edge, obnoxious California entitlement, and fake, I-am-acting-way-happier-and-way-more-laid-back-than-I-really-am. behavior. You feel light nausea. Thank god everyone is buried in their i-phones and they can’t notice the disgust in your eyes.

You are thinking that maybe you should check your phone too. Nothing exciting since you woke up, except a tempting livingsocial trip deal for the coming weekend that you can’t make, because your boss asked you to come in on Saturday. You get off the bus on Sansome and you notice the same headphone / sunglasses wearing drones rushing to work while trying oh so hard to look excited about their day….

Now you have to walk through this mess till you get to your cubicle on Howard / 2nd. You have a few minutes to prepare yourself to act like you care about your work. You approach your building and you see the longest line for blue bottle. Do these people work? They seem to really enjoy standing in that line. Oh well, who can blame them – it surely is better than sitting around in a stuffy office with little or not air circulation and refreshing e-mail ever 2 minutes upstairs. Now you admire them. What looked like a line of shame a moment ago now looks rather tempting. You get in line and you hope your turn never comes. You are really not in the mood to listen to the same “how was your weekend?” bs and pretend like you care about your co-workers’ Napa and Tahoe adventures. You are like, you know, like soooo over it.

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