Stop Listening and Start Observing

san francisco flashy cars and douchebagsHow many times have you heard “I don’t care about money” from someone who turned out later to be quite concerned with money? How many times your self proclaimed close friend wasn’t there for you when you needed help  – whether a roof to stay under for a few days or a few dollars to borrow. How many people you know, who start every other sentence with “Trust me….” are not all that trustworthy?  How many times have you had a girl tell you on your date that she is not going to sleep with you to only end up under you in a couple of hours.

So many people in SF love to say how non-materialistic they are, and how they are not concerned with superficial things, and yet so many of them are all about their jobs, stock options, fashion, expensive traveling, fine dining and attention whoring about all of the above on Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest. They might be wearing wrinkled cargo pants and a not-so-fashionable sweater, but as soon as they turn around the corner,  they drive away in their shiny BMW’s to their high-priced SOMA condo, which is as unoriginal as its occupant.

Being a douche in disguise is a very popular style these days in the city, and that kind of a douche is even more contemptible than the ones who are honest about being douches. With the latter, you know exactly what you are getting and you are much less likely to be deceived. Like one of my friends from LA said once: “At least we are honest about being superficial. Unlike you, guys, we are not hiding our nature behind tattoos, piercings, and messy hair.”

The old truth “Actions speak louder than words” is more relevant today, here, in San Francisco, than ever. And, if you truly want to learn about people, focus on their actions and behavior, rather than how they describe themselves.

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