The Most Obvious Reason Women Flake on Guys in SF

dressed up woman coffee tree san franciscoDating and sex is simply not women’s priority in this town. A combination of being too jaded by too many Tinder / Hinge dates that haven’t gone anywhere, having sex drive suppressed by corporate jobs and feminist propaganda, and not having female imagination stimulated by quality romantic movies and books pushes love to the bottom of the local woman’s list, and way below career, dining, make-up and clothes, yoga, and trips to Napa / Tahoe.

When dating, love and sex are not your priority, you are not going to be inclined to flirt and notice romantic opportunities around you. In fact your cold stand-offish energy will clearly communicate that you just not interested in the opposite sex – from unapproachable facial expression and sunglasses, to not taking your eyes off of your smartphone and and turning away the moment any guy glances at you.  And even if you do meet someone who you are kind of interested, your chance of flaking will be quite high, because … you just not that interested – not in that guys specifically, but in the entire male kind in general.

You are missing out. The question is whether you know how much.

Three Types of San Francisco Fatigue

san-francisco-fatigue1. Dating fatigue. A thousand 30 min coffee dates that go nowhere will leave you empty, jaded, hopeless, and worn out physically and mentally, feeling profoundly bitter about wasting so much time and energy.

2. Texting fatigue. Staring at your phone screen too much and sending way more text messages than you really need to will waste a lot of your time that could be spent doing so many other things.

3. Fakeness fatigue. Constantly smiling, trying to appear more friendly, excited, and patient than you really are, asking and telling people things you don’t really mean (i.e. how are you? How was your weekend? Take your time. After you…), and suppressing negative emotions will eventually make you burst in rage or dive deep into depression due to this major lack of congruence between how you really feel and how you pretend to feel.

Three Reasons You Are Overbooked for the Next Two Weeks

  • overbookedYour job sucks. You spend at least 8 hours per day doing something you don’t like, don’t care for and feel is mundane and insignificant to your community or to humanity in general. Therefore, you have to make it up to yourself by packing as much stuff that makes you happy as humanly possible in little free time you have during the week.
  • You are insecure about your social status and value, and you think that overbooking yourself and making yourself sound super busy makes you more attractive. Wrong. It makes you look like a slave of your own circumstances. At least real slaves were forced to do what they don’ want to. You brought it upon yourself.
  • You are suffering from fear of missing out (FOMO) and keeping up with the Jones’es or rather – douches. You are a victim of the pressure to hit every type of restaurant and bar, yoga studio and hiking trip, post every picture on Facebook, and respond to every text, ping and e-mail, while not neglecting happy hours and trips to Napa & Tahoe.

We Are Incapable of Disagreeing or Debating

One negative comment, a disagreement with or even the subtlest criticism toward a fellow human being will necessary ignite a fight, full of uncalled for insults. We are incapable of addressing or discussing issues when someone is judging our behavior or actions. Instead, we habitually get defensive and temperamental. So much for mature, civilized, western society.

The next time you cross the street and some driver doesn’t notice you, coming a bit too close to you, try not to do what anyone else in SF would do – try not to stare him down or yell and cuss at him. Chances are quite high he didn’t try to run you over on purpose, and he is already scared of what might have happened.