* He calls/e-mails/texts you back really quickly when he needs something, but when you ask for something – instead of feeling the urge to reciprocate your previously demonstrated kindness and responsiveness, he takes a surprisingly long time to get back to you, if ever.
* He says he wants to see you, but when you meet up, all he talks about is himself and his problems and/or accomplishments without showing any (genuine) interest in you and your life.
* When you talk, he hears what you are saying but he is really not listening and his mind is not there. He is just waiting for his turn to talk.
Do you have a friend like that? If so, it’s time to call him on his self-centered ways. Hopefully he is mature enough to appreciate your tough love and not get defensive or be offended by your candor.
1. Get an I-phone and become glued to it, texting and browsing Facebook 24/7.
2. Start doing yoga.
3. Join a start-up.
4. Get on a juicing diet.
5. Go skiing in Tahoe.
6. Go wine tasting in Napa.
7. Start a Flickr page that talks all about your around-the-world travel, and start posting photos on Facebook of you standing by mountains in remote parts of the world, right before you had a word with Dalai Lama.
8. Stop leaving voice messages.
9. Stop listening to voice messages.
10. Always text and never call.
11. Wear sunglasses whether you need them or not.
12. Start saying “I know, right?”, “Yes and now” and “I don’t judge”.
13. Develop road rage and start honking for no good reason when driving.
14. Develop an overall ADD, and respond to e-mails and text messages with incomplete or non-responsive replies.
15. Start flaking and canceling social engagements on a short notice.
16. Become fake, say what you don’t mean, smile when you don’t feel like it, and say “take your time” when you are really impatient.
17. Start training for a marathon.
18. Start taking spinning classes.
19. Get a tablet.
20. Start talking about how much you love your life and this city.
What do you hear when someone says “foodie”? Do you hear “a classy person with a refined taste in food, wine, and fine dining”?
I hear something entirely different. I hear “I really don’t have a life, and I don’t have any more meaningful hobbies than chasing the latest and the greatest when it comes to food and restaurants. I try to dress up my profoundly empty and boring life with trips to Napa, standing two hours in line to have brunch on Sundays, and dining in overrated, fattening French & Italian restaurants, because there is really nothing else better to do.”
How is it that such distinguished, outstanding talents as Leonardo DiCaprio and Rafael Nadal show so much gratitude and humility, giving so much credit for their success to others, and yet the ordinary folk in SF walk around with their chins high up, thinking that being a part of some obscure cloud enterprise hamster wheel makes them so damn special…
Have you ever wondered why lawyers are known to be among the most bitter and cynical people out there?
I will tell you why.
Their bitterness stems from one thing – from a major, fundamental disappointment.
Lawyers are profoundly disappointed in their career. They were hoping to fight for justice and truth, but instead they end up closing deals, as if they were car salesmen.
Lawyers become deeply disappointed in the human kind, because they learn that learn are not nearly as advanced as they think they are. Even the ones with advanced degrees and professional accomplishments often appear to be seriously lacking in the most basic objectivity and logic. And of course everyone lies. Some are so out of touch with reality that they start believing their own lies.
Working in an adversary rather than collaborative setting doesn’t exactly help in the cynicism and bitterness department.
In the age of prevailing entitlement/victim mentality, reluctance to take responsibility and be accountable, and excuses for just about any failure, it’s worth listening to the president’s words of admitting his past mistakes and thanking those who stood behind him when it mattered most. Like him or not, we have a lot to learn from Obama, especially those of us who like to walk around and talk about how accomplished we are without ever discussing our mistakes.
My most favorite part, however, is where Obama says – “no excuses!”
I didn’t have to go far to find a very typical, way overused, way cliche “exotic”, look-at-me-and-my-adventurous-spirit picture. I just poked around Facebook for a couple of minutes and found this classic piece…
After the lady on the photo below left, I and the woman who sat next to me both chuckled and agreed that judging by the way she talked and carried herself, she is more than ready to be a drill sergeant for US Marine Corp.
In this great article about perception v reality, the author makes a point that must be more relevant to the San Francisco culture and attitude than to any other place. Being told all about how unattractive being insecure is, we move waaaay too much to the other extreme, not realizing that acting like you are more accomplished or more attractive than you really are, bragging all about how great you are, or otherwise overplaying your hand in any aspect of life doesn’t flatter you; it makes you look more ridiculous and obnoxious to anyone around you who possesses the most basic intuition and perception. Even though chest beating has been in style for quite a while now, it doesn’t make it an attractive quality.
I can see the good intentions – one would assume that removing the actual walls between people will remove the social walls between them at work and will encourage open communication and ideas. However, just like with communal tables in restaurants, it just doesn’t work. Making all the employees sit in a large space next to each other doesn’t really benefit anyone, and if anything – instead of encouraging creativity, it is actually counterproductive. No one talks to each other. Just about everyone is looking at the computer screen and wearing noise-canceling headphones. If anything needs to be communicated, it’s done by e-mail just like in any other setting, even between the co-workers who literally sit next to each other.
I would think that having a little more privacy, such as having at least your own cubicle if not your own office, would actually be more conducive to coming up with creative ideas. Just as importantly, having private offices, however small they might be, allows the male workers to masturbate, which is critical to maintaining one’s sanity during those frequent times when work becomes unbearably boring, depressing or… unbearably unbearable.